Holiday gifts for every Toronto Raptor, including Danny Green’s time machine
It’s the holiday season, and generosity is in the air. We decided to join in the holiday spirit by giving all the Toronto Raptors a (hypothetical) gift.
The holiday season is here. A wonderful time where we can show friends and family members just how much we love them, by putting a concrete dollar amount on that love. We watch the Toronto Raptors enough that they are like family. I mean not actually like family, don’t get me wrong, I’m not sending Kawhi a Christmas card.
But family enough for me to give them all hypothetical gifts. Some of these gifts are nicer than others, and you might think that is unfair, but quite simply, the gift is based on how much I care for them as a player. And like my future children, my love is dependent entirely on their abilities as a basketball player (Seriously, little Jordan is going to need to make more than a few corner threes before he/she is allowed the privilege of dinner).
Chris Boucher – A gift card to Mandarin Buffet
According to HoopsHype, Chris Boucher makes approximately $77,000 per year. I’m not a financial czar, but that feels like it should be enough to eat comfortably. However, looking at Chris Boucher might make you question that.
The present-day favorite to win the G-League’s MVP award is thin as a rail. It doesn’t look like anyone has introduced him to a buffet, and I’d like to change that. Let’s get Chris a gift card to Mandarin Buffet.
Boucher’s game and skillset are undeniably good, but the 25-year-old needs to add bulk to handle the physicality of the NBA game. A few “shifts” at the Mandarin should help him do just that.